Your Kindle Notes For:

Untamed

Glennon Doyle

Last accessed on Thursday June 22, 2023

30 Highlight(s) | 5 Note(s)

Some highlights have been hidden or truncated due to export limits.

Yellow highlight | Location: 164 Note | Location: 164

“What’s happening inside you right now?” I knew what she’d tell me. She’d say, “Something’s off about my life. I feel restless and frustrated. I have this hunch that everything was supposed to be more beautiful than this. I imagine fenceless, wide-open savannas. I want to run and hunt and kill. I want to sleep under an ink-black, silent sky filled with stars. It’s all so real I can taste it.”

Note:

Yellow highlight | Location: 200 Note | Location: 200

Make yourself fit. You’ll be uncomfortable at first, but don’t worry—eventually you’ll forget you’re caged. Soon this will just feel like: life.

Note:

Yellow highlight | Location: 206 Note | Location: 206

Good girls aren’t hungry, furious, or wild. All of the things that make a woman human are a good girl’s dirty secret.

Note:

Yellow highlight | Location: 215 Note | Location: 215

I looked hard at my faith, my friendships, my work, my sexuality, my entire life and asked: How much of this was my idea? Do I truly want any of this, or is this what I was conditioned to want? Which of my beliefs are of my own creation and which were programmed into me? How much of who I’ve become is inherent, and how much was just inherited? How much of the way I look and speak and behave is just how other people have trained me to look and speak and behave? How many of the things I’ve spent my life chasing are just dirty pink bunnies? Who was I before I became who the world told me to be? Over time, I walked away from my cages. I slowly built a new marriage, a new faith, a new worldview, a new purpose, a new family, and a new identity by design instead of default. From my imagination instead of my indoctrination. From my wild instead of from my training.

Note:

Yellow highlight | Location: 234 Note | Location: 234

That is why she is called woman. Because women came from the womb of man. Womb—man.”

Note:

Yellow highlight | Location: 327 Note | Location: 327

The opposite of sensitive is not brave. It’s not brave to refuse to pay attention, to refuse to notice, to refuse to feel and know and imagine. The opposite of sensitive is insensitive, and that’s no badge of honor.

Note:

Yellow highlight | Location: 336 Note | Location: 336

We’re on the bow of the Titanic, pointing, crying out, “Iceberg! Iceberg!” while everyone else is below deck, yelling back, “We just want to keep dancing!”

Note:

Yellow highlight | Location: 357 Note | Location: 357

I remind myself that what is really happening in the circle doesn’t matter. What matters is what people outside the circle perceive to be happening there. What matters is not what is real, but what I can convince others is real. What matters is not how I feel inside, but how I appear to feel on the outside. How I appear to feel will determine how others feel about me. What matters is how others feel about me. So I act like someone who feels Golden.

Note:

Yellow highlight | Location: 375 Note | Location: 375

If one cannot be Golden, then one must pretend that one does not want to be.

Note:

Yellow highlight | Location: 376 Note | Location: 376

I rigged an election trying to be Golden. I spent sixteen years with my head in a toilet trying to be light. I drank myself numb for a decade, trying to be pleasant. I’ve giggled at and slept with assholes, trying to be touchable. I’ve held my tongue so hard I tasted blood, trying to be gentle. I’ve spent thousands on potions and poisons, trying to be youthful. I have denied myself for decades, trying to be pure.

Note:

Yellow highlight | Location: 435 Note | Location: 435

She married him anyway, because there were so many people she would have disappointed if she had called it off. There was only one of her, so she disappointed herself instead.

Note:

Yellow highlight | Location: 471 Note | Location: 471

What is the point of being a writer if I have to say words about the words I’ve already written?

Note:

Yellow highlight | Location: 483 Note | Location: 483

I’d let down my guard and trusted that the other characters in my story would act as they should and that my plot would unfold as I’d mapped it. I’d rendered my own future and my children vulnerable by ceding creative control to another character. What an idiot. Never again. I would take back full control,

Note:

Yellow highlight | Location: 620 Note | Location: 620

When I was a child, I felt what I needed to feel and I followed my gut and I planned only from my imagination. I was wild until I was tamed by shame. Until I started hiding and numbing my feelings for fear of being too much. Until I started deferring to others’ advice instead of trusting my own intuition. Until I became convinced that my imagination was ridiculous and my desires were selfish. Until I surrendered myself to the cages of others’ expectations, cultural mandates, and institutional allegiances. Until I buried who I was in order to become what I should be. I lost myself when I learned how to please.

Note:

Yellow highlight | Location: 629 Note | Location: 629

built a life of my own. I did it by resurrecting the very parts of myself I was trained to mistrust, hide, and abandon in order to keep others comfortable: My emotions My intuition My imagination My courage Those are the keys to freedom. Those are who we are.

Note:

Yellow highlight | Location: 632 Note | Location: 632

Will we be brave enough to unlock ourselves? Will we be brave enough to set ourselves free? Will we finally step out of our cages and say to ourselves, to our people, and to the world: Here I Am.

Note:

Yellow highlight | Location: 669 Note | Location: 669

Consumer culture promises us that we can buy our way out of pain—that the reason we’re sad and angry is not that being human hurts; it’s because we don’t have those countertops, her thighs, these jeans. This is a clever way to run an economy, but it is no way to run a life. Consuming keeps us distracted, busy, and numb. Numbness keeps us from becoming.

Note:

Yellow highlight | Location: 679 Note | Location: 679

Suffering is what happens when we avoid pain and consequently miss our becoming.

Note:

Yellow highlight | Location: 681 Note | Location: 681

my goal is to stop abandoning myself—and stay.

Note:

Yellow highlight | Location: 735 Note | Location: 735

What I learned (even though I am afraid to say it) is that God lives in this deepness inside me. When I recognize God’s presence and guidance, God celebrates by flooding me with warm liquid gold.

Note:

Yellow highlight | Location: 761 Note | Location: 761

I have learned that if I want to rise, I have to sink first. I have to search for and depend upon the voice of inner wisdom instead of voices of outer approval. This saves me from living someone else’s life.

Note:

Yellow highlight | Location: 806 Note | Location: 806

My faith has nothing to do with religion anymore. To me, living by faith is allowing the swelling and pressing inside me to direct my outward words and decisions.

Note:

Yellow highlight | Location: 845 Note | Location: 845

“Not this” is a very important stage. But knowing what we do not want is not the same as knowing what we do want.

Note:

Yellow highlight | Location: 865 Note | Location: 865

Sasha spent most of her days hustling to earn her husband’s love, just like her mom had done to earn her dad’s. She wrote, “I’m so tired and lonely. What’s the right thing to do here?” I replied, “Sasha, can you tell me a story about the truest, most beautiful marriage you can imagine?”

Note:

Yellow highlight | Location: 903 Note | Location: 903

Let’s conjure up, from the depths of our souls: The truest, most beautiful lives we can imagine. The truest, most beautiful families we can fathom. The truest, most beautiful world we can hope for. Let’s put it all on paper. Let’s look at what we’ve written and decide that these are not pipe dreams; these are our marching orders. These are the blueprints for our lives, our families, and the world. May the invisible order become visible. May our dreams become our plans.

Note:

Note | Location: 1,700

I am my own touch tree. I have everything I need inside me. I am never gonna lose me.

Note | Location: 1,779

Safetyism

Note | Location: 1,804

Right after itchy boredom is self discovery.

We need to hang in the boredom.

Note | Location: 1,933

Chris uses all his energy outside leaves non for home.

I used to do the same

Yellow highlight | Location: 2,664 Note | Location: 2,664

what I’m trying to say is that when you were very little you did not choose yourself instead of God and church. You chose yourself and God, instead of church. When you chose yourself, you chose God. When you walked away from church, you took God with you. God is in you.

Note:

Yellow highlight | Location: 2,690 Note | Location: 2,690

Faith is about trusting.” Do not think. Do not feel. Do not know. Mistrust your own heart and mind, and trust us. That is faith. He wanted me to believe that trusting him was trusting God. But he was not my connection to God. My heart and mind were my connections to God. If I shut those down, I’d be trusting the men who led this church instead of trusting God. I’d be relying on their understanding.

Note:

Yellow highlight | Location: 2,767 Note | Location: 2,767

if we can find ourselves in those we’ve been indoctrinated to see as other, then we become unable to hurt them. When we stop hurting them, we stop hurting ourselves. When we stop hurting ourselves, we begin to heal.

Note:

Yellow highlight | Location: 2,784 Note | Location: 2,784

thank you for knowing that you have a choice to make. Thank you for not landing on: I love you, but…We know that Love has no buts. If you want to change me, you do not love me. If you feel warm toward me but also believe I’m going to burn in hell, you do not love me. If you wish me well but vote against my family being protected by the law, you do not love me. Thank you for understanding that to love me as yourself means to want for me and for my family every good thing you want for yourself and your family. Anything less than that is less than love. So, yes. I agree that you have a choice to make. You have to choose between loving me and keeping your beliefs. Thank you for being intellectually honest about that.

Note:

Yellow highlight | Location: 2,802 Note | Location: 2,802

When choosing between something you Know and something other people taught you to believe, choose what you Know. As Whitman said, “Re-examine all you have been told in school or church or in any book, and dismiss whatever insults your own soul.”

Note:

Note | Location: 2,908

Own you anger and emotion. Not someone else. It’s me.

Would you like to take some notes?

You haven’t created any notes for this book yet. You can add or remove bookmarks, highlights, and notes at any location in a Kindle book.

Learn more about notes and highlights

Sorry, we''ve experienced a problem. Please try again.